A boulder falls from the sky...
Imagine a person walking with purpose towards a destination. Suddenly, out of the sky, a giant boulder falls and lands directly in front of them, blocking their path. The person is perfectly safe, with no injuries, but now the boulder is in the way, obstructing progress. As this person starts to realize that they can no longer proceed forward on this path, anger sets in and they start to curse the boulder.
As onlookers, we can see many solutions to solve this problem: they could walk around the boulder, attempt to climb over it, or seek help to move the boulder. The chosen solution (yelling at the boulder) yields no results, except to raise blood pressure and to shut down creative thinking.
I used to laugh at this story, thinking that this person was so silly to get so upset; there were many potential solutions out there. But as I started thinking about the boulders in my life, I had to let go that sense of superiority as I discovered I was guilty of yelling at my own boulders.
For example, behind my house is an alley that divides the houses on the west and east sides of this block. When I first moved in and looked out my window in the back, there was a small view. It wasn’t grand, but I could see for some distance and appreciated watching the big sky. The property on the other side of the alley was old and in terrible shape, but I wasn't too concerned about it.
The older home is behind the yellow/white building that sits behind the blue tarp.
In March of this year, I started seeing construction equipment near the older home and I watched them tear it down and lay foundations for a new home.
March demolition
June construction
I wasn't too worried at the time, but soon, anxiety set in. It was a noisy process and as the days went by, I grew more and more disappointed. The replacement project was three stories high. Definitely an eyesore from my point of view.
July construction
Upon seeing this, I complained to friends and family. Woe is me, I don't like the new construction, I no longer feel the sense of privacy and expansiveness that I used to when I looked out this window.
Looking at it from a new perspective, this boulder landed in my backyard. And I had done a pretty good job of not only yelling at it but sharing this victim thinking with supportive friends. Looking back on it, yes, there is a sense of disappointment that things didn't go the way I wanted them to go. However, there was nothing to be done but to let go of my desire for things to go my way, and figure out what was within my control, and choose next steps.
As I examined this boulder, I asked myself: what gifts might be hidden here? It took some reflection, but here's what I came up with:
The old property was in terrible shape and had not been maintained in the last 20 years, so was likely harboring rats and vermin. This new construction will create a cleaner and healthier environment in the neighborhood.
This new property will likely contribute to maintaining, if not increasing the property values of the homes in my neighborhood.
This home will allow new families to move into the neighborhood and take advantage of the excellent school systems we have here.
The new construction no longer makes the giant RV parking structure in the back of my property look so ugly. I hardly notice it anymore!
I still love my home and neighborhood, this is really a minor issue.
I'm growing my resilience and flexibility by accepting new changes in my life.
Now, when I am upset about something, I ask myself, might this be a boulder in my path? What am I hanging on to?
What boulders might be landing in your path?
Wishing you a fun summer!
A West Seattle crow, manning the information booth