Global Grumpiness?
Does the world seem a little thornier these days?
I ask myself this question as I notice what goes on around me:
A recent Facebook post asked whether or not it's OK to put bagged dog waste into a neighbor's trash can. In less than 24 hours, there were 505 responses; 505 people with strong, heated points of view on the best way to dispose of dog waste!
A friend of mine was trying to make a right turn into a parking lot but had to drive across a single lane of cars waiting for the ferry. On her first attempt, the ferry-waiting driver blocking her path assumed the worst: that she was trying to cut the ferry line. He yelled and waved at her as if she were threatening his life, refusing to yield. Finally, she waited patiently and another driver allowed her to go through.
I called my cell phone provider to ask a billing question. I found myself being short and snarky with the customer service representative. She didn't deserve my impatient tone of voice. Near the end of the conversation, I apologized to her, a little embarrassed that I had let myself get so wound up over a billing error.
Someone recently shared the following analogy: imagine your brain is an aquarium and the water level is your state of mind. Within the aquarium are several large rocks: your family, friends, career, hobbies, and other things that make up your life. The water level is near the top, but there are a couple of inches of air space to allow for movement. Last year, the pandemic arrived and dropped a new, large rock inside everyone's aquarium. Now the water level is even with the top of the aquarium and the brain has much less capacity to be calm, reasonable, and flexible. It takes almost nothing for the water to splash over the edge. Imagine any other big change in your life in addition to the pandemic, and the water is now spilling over the edge of the tank.
This made a lot of sense to me. The pandemic has changed life for all of us. The effects have been serious (illness, death, job/home loss) and challenging (close-quartered lockdowns, working from home, lack of travel and family visits, seclusion). We've been here for about 20 months now, we're not sure when we'll come out of this, nor how things will look when we get there.
We're all navigating new territory, and, likely, we're not at our best. I came to the realization that: I can't control the pandemic, nor how people around me behave. However, I can control how I choose to react.
How can I create more space and time for myself and adjust to all of the pandemic-related changes and uncertainty?
How can I find a little extra compassion for those in my life who find change challenging?
When can I pause, withhold judgment and catch my breath before responding?
How can I more consistently give people the benefit of the doubt?
Can I offer a smile and kind word to someone who seems to be having a rough day?
In the meantime, Adam Grant has a great TED talk on the psychological effects of the pandemic and how to rediscover your flow. I wish you well as you navigate the pandemic and noticing that there might just be a glimmer of light at the end of this long tunnel.
