Dare 2 - February 2025
How did your January dare go? What happened? What did you learn about yourself? Watch a short video about the results of my January dare here.
It's now February; it's time for a new dare. This month’s dare is about saying no. Saying no can be easy in some cases, and harder in others. I can easily say no to someone who knocks on my door selling magazine subscriptions. I find it harder to say no when people want help. I like to think of myself as a person who is compassionate and willing to help others when asked. In these cases, I must consider whether I’m doing this out of ego need (I get to be the hero), a compassionate desire to help, or both.
Stoplight regulating one-way traffic to the Cote Des Basques, Biarritz, France.
I recently said no to a project I launched earlier this year. After leaving corporate life, I wanted to dive into the community and lead a cool project: to bring Blue Zones to West Seattle. I sent a message to a Facebook group and found 8 other women interested in the project. We started researching the process and I contacted a Blue Zones representative to better understand the work. However, as time passed, I began to realize the enormity of this type of project. These initiatives typically take 3-5 years to deploy across a community and it would most definitely take much of my time.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized that while the Blue Zones project was a very worthwhile endeavor, I was spending more time with my 'shiny new object' than I was marketing my business. I was uncomfortable creating marketing content to post to social media for my business, and much more comfortable in a project manager role. About 3 months after we had our initial conversation with the team, I let everyone know that I could no longer lead the work. I would be happy to transition the work to someone else, but that was the best I could do.
Stop sign, West Seattle, WA
This no was a hard one, I felt like I was letting everyone down. I've always seen myself as the 'can-do' person, the one who follows through. Yet this time, I had to reluctantly back out of this project. I still fully believe in the work of Blue Zones, but my time is better spent building my coaching business and coaching clients. I had spent too much time working at 150% to repeat this mistake in my post-corporate life. Taking on the Blue Zones was one of those stretch goals that was neither healthy nor sustainable in the long run.
Since letting this project go, I've been more focused on the business. And I've been cautious about saying yes. There are many good causes, ideas, and projects to take on. The thing is, every time you say yes to one thing, you're saying no to many other things. When I say yes to building my business, I'm saying yes to my future. I'm also saying no to other worthwhile projects, commitments, and activities. We all have the same 24 hours in a day. How do you want to spend yours?
Florida risk mitigation, Blue Spring State Park
What will you say no to in February? Is it a friendship that no longer serves? Or maybe you want to say no to endless doom scrolling on your phone to say yes to something more satisfying? Perhaps you want to say no to sleeping in and spend 30 minutes walking in the morning?
I dare you to say no to one thing this month.
This downloadable guide might help.
As you prepare your February dare:
What would you like to dare this month?
What about it makes this activity uncomfortable? What are you risking?
What thought patterns are keeping you stuck?
On a scale of 1-10, how scary was this dare for you?
After your dare
What happened? What was in your control? What was not in your control?
What worked well? What didn't work so well?
What did you learn about yourself?
I can't wait to hear how things go!