The garden as coach Part 1 - The Overgrown Garden

It's now officially summer in the US and my garden is in full swing.  The growing season in the Pacific Northwest is short; from mid-May to mid-September.  I do a lot of thinking when I'm gardening (e.g. weeding) and I've noticed several parallels between coaching and gardening. This will be the first in a three-part series titled: The garden as a coach

Garden needing some attention, July 2022

Part 1 - The overgrown garden

Working with a new client is a bit like working in an overgrown garden. There is often a lot of potential there, including fertile soil and a few healthy plants. Most of my clients are well educated, and highly successful, with strong careers, wonderful families, healthy habits, and active social life.  But the lives of these clients also include many weedy habits such as people-pleasing, poor boundaries, over-commitment, and exhaustion.  They come to me with a desire to find clarity in their goals and to decide on next steps

The first step is to understand what's going on in their lives.  What beliefs and values are important?  Beliefs and values are often so deeply held, that they often become automatic habits and reactions.  A coach can help bring these to the surface so that you consciously see what's been driving you all these years.

Garden in progress, July 2022

 The next step is to review your beliefs and values.  Which ones are worth keeping, and which ones should be let go?  It's not always easy to recognize a weed from a plant that's worth keeping. How do your beliefs serve you today?  Are they still serving you today?  Which ones do you want to let go of?

In the third step, you'll move to deep coaching and replace old beliefs with new ones that better serve you.  This is very much akin to taking out dandelions. Dandelions have long taproots.  You have to dig a little to ensure you get the entire taproot. Removing the plant and leaving the taproot in the soil will lead to another dandelion in just a few days.

Echinacea, July 2022

Beliefs and habits that don't serve you ("This is too hard", "I'm not smart enough to do this", "I'm just going to give up on myself", "This is too much work") often have a very long taproot that started with early life experiences.  Working with a coach, you'll start replacing unhelpful beliefs with helpful ones  ("I can do this", I can figure this out", "I am resourceful", "I can do hard things").  You'll start practicing them and getting good at them. By removing the old weeds including the full root, you provide more room in your garden to grow and nurture new, helpful thoughts that support your long-term goals. 

 Through openness, a willingness to be curious and to practice new habits,  you'll be amazed at how beautiful your garden can be. To quote Glenda the Good Witch from the Wizard of Oz "You've always had the power my dear". 

Crocosmia, July 2022

 I wish you a beautiful and fruitful garden this summer!

Cynthia